But if that's what it takes to praise You Jesus...

Life is full of ups and downs, peaks and valleys. What humans don't like about life...is the trials, pain, suffering, emptiness, hopelessness. Oh Lord! But if that's what it takes to praise You, to learn love, joy, peace, patience to love You, to realize how beautiful and glorious You are, to realize how much You love me, if that's what it takes to give up ownership over my life and surrender it all to You! Jesus... BRING THE RAIN! May God be glorified...May He be lifted higher!

Welcome

Welcome

So I just came back from the camping trip with the KCM class of '12.

I want to blog about it and share my reflections...I have my own personal journal, so I usually write my reflections on there, but I'll write them here this time, just cuz I did this for the Freshmen beach trip.

Monday:
I woke up like 6:30 to 7, I had to take a taxi to CP because I didn't have a ride there and my ride to Assateague was Calvin, who was driving people from CP.

The taxi ride was interesting. It was a muslim guy. I wanted to evangelize to him, but I was still unsure. We talked about life and then eventually we got to the subject of death. The Holy Spirit seemed to be leading me to evangelize after all. I asked him what he thought about what happens after we die with the intention of talking about the gospel. He laughed like crazy and said that nothing happens. We only invented the idea of heaven so that it would be easier for us to let go when death happens. I didn't know what to say to that. I was having a hard time coming up with something to respond. I can only think in response that people say those kinds of things so that it would be easier for them to indulge in fleshly desires. If nothing happens after we die, then I can do whatever I want now. I decided to just get his name and pray for him by name. His name is Sam, he's old, I pray for his salvation.

I got to commons and Calvin wasn't there so I chilled at their place. James Park let me in and we just ate cereal and talked about how to get there and stuff. We did some "recon" haha, basically did research on our destination. Calvin eventually came and we went to commons to pick up other things. Antwoine rode with us too. Something I liked about the ride was that every single person was conscious about the kind of music that we were listening to. It's encouraging to see the Holy Spirit open their eyes to be aware of things like that.

We were distracted by the music and ended up going off course, so we got to the meeting place late. Then we went ahead, checked in, then started setting up tents.

I felt like we were in a different world. A world of sand with wind. There was no sign of civilization in sight except the toilet and the showers. The toilet was just a toilet seat with a hole in the ground with a bottomless pit. No soap, Hand sanitizer. The shower was a cold shower and a drain, typical for beaches.

We sent up our tents and the tents looked like they were going to be blown away. Then we went to eat, I ate two sandwiches with ham and mustard and sunchips. Then we went off to the beach.

First we were just playing with the waves, then some of the guys decided to actually go in the water, so we did, when we got there the girls went to change, we played in the water for a while, then the girls came very very late...haha. By that time, the guys were almost done playing with the waves. I played with Eric I think with his board. He was teaching me how glide or hydroplane over the waves. Eric pointed me to the cross by letting me have fun with his board, when he could have just used it by himself and had all the fun. I treasure this moment with Eric because it is a nice summary of our relationship. When I was a freshmen in college, Eric spent time with me, taking care of me and teaching me things, as we were both electrical engineering majors. Sorry for getting a lil touchy, haha moving on...

So Calvin, James, and I took a shower after I think. Calvin shared his body soap and shampoo with us, that was cool.

After that we decided to eat dinner. We couldn't light the fire because of the wind, so we initially used towels to block the wind. It didn't work so we used tarp? (the top part of a tent) and had people line up to block the wind. We used two tarps. It was funny because the camp next to us was just playing frisbee and chillin, while we were putting in a group effort just to make food.

Our lighter didn't seem to work, so we had to borrow from the camp next to us. Angel and Mikey seemed to play a big role in starting the fire since they were the ones blowing on the charcoal to make them burn. We had a lot to cook, so we had to hold the tarp for a while. I was holding the tarp next to Joyce. Joyce and I talked about our semesters...I was encouraged to hear how Joyce has been learning a lot about relationships this past semester.

Christine saw that I was holding the tarp for a while, she offered to take my place, then I was free. It reminds me of the gospel how Jesus took our place and bore God's wrath, that we may be free and forgiven. I was encouraged by everyone cooperating. No one was complaining and we were all working together. Some people couldn't eat because they're hands were occupied. Suzie fed some of us. Albert and I think Asaph or Caleb would take the burgers and make them for everyone. That was cool. Also, Mikey and Eric brought galbi, even though they were not supposed to. How cool. There was so much grace through service. Praise God.

After eating, we moved onto the campfire, it slowly got dark. Albert and I had Christina's song book and we were just going through it playing guitar and singing songs. It was nice. Angel would sing along too, as well as other people around the fire. I think this was one of my favorite memories, singing at the beach, cool cozy sand underneath our feet, nice cooling breeze, pitch dark, hints of star and lightning with no thunder, next to a warm camp fire, singing songs of praise to God, with my brothers and sisters in Christ.

Then some went to sleep, others had some deep conversations. I had a nice talk with Calvin, my brother from freshmen year. We were talking about little things, but then moved on to talk about his church and how people are leaving his church. He shared about the love that his EM or college pastor had for his church, and about his ideas about leaving the church. It was a nice talk. We went to the tent, then Caleb, Asaph, and Albert followed and we all went to sleep.

Next day, Tuesday, a lot of people went to see the sunrise at 5AM, unfortunately, I slept through it. I woke up and brushed my teeth, then I went to go eat muffins. Everyone decided to go hiking, except Antwoine who went by the beach to do his QTs I suppose.

As we were hiking, we walked by people with journals and stuff. They seemed to be doing research. I think they were also from UMCP.

After hiking we all decided to go to the beach. However, Suzie locked herself out of her car by leaving the keys in her car. Calvin and I decided to show some love and share in trouble by waiting with Suzie. Angel came by and called Triple A and that was that. It was encouraging to see people willing to share Suzie's burden by staying with her while they were trying to figure out how to get the keys out. Since we were already at the parking lot, I decided to drop something off in Calvin's car, but instead I did my QTs and I read Philippians 4:14, "Yet it was kind of you to share my trouble." I was unsure about whether or not to leave Suzie. She already had a lot of people waiting with her, but through this verse, I believe that God was telling me to wait with Suzie, so I did. Antwoine popped up later out of nowhere with his Bible and waited with us. It was random haha.

After we found out that Triple A was on it's way, we all decided to go back to the beach. I just dug up holes with Calvin, Mikey, and Albert. We eventually buried Mikey in one of the holes and then took pictures. After we did 4 man push ups. The girls wanted to do it too and we challenged them. We won, we did 6 man push ups too.

Hmm, after that we ate ramyun. We had to hold the tarp again too. I held it for a while. I have to admit that I was getting kinda disappointed because no one was offering to exchange places with me. But then I thought again that if I was among the people who weren't doing anything, I would have done the same thing to the people holding the tarp. I also remembered how Jesus sacrificed Himself for us. Why do I act like things are unfair if I am holding this tarp and others are just chillin? I am already redeemed, we all were, it's over. We have been blessed beyond measure, so why complain?

Afterwards I went to play frisbee with Caleb and Albert. Eventually Young and Calvin joined. We weren't the best at throwing frisbees, the frisbee would go in all kinds of directions. But no one complained. I thought that was cool. It reminded me of the gospel how Jesus sacrificed Himself for us because of our inadequacies.

The girls wanted to go to the beach, so the boys decided to follow, but some were so lazy that some of us stayed halfway and just collapsed on the sand. It was beautiful, but then it was about to rain, so we had to run and put tarp over our tent. Then it was raining hard. Everyone was at their car, except Asaph, Caleb, Albert, and I. Albert and Caleb went out in the rain to make sure that all of our stuff were secure from the rain. They wouldn't come into our tent because they were dirty from the rain. I thought that was nice and thoughtful. I offered my towel to Albert and Caleb to help them dry off and get cleaned.

Afterwards the sun came out, then we all just loafed around until dinner. I went to shower. I forgot the name of the place that we were eating. It was something something related to ribs. A lot of us got a quarter dark chicken with 4 ribs. It was very expensive.

We then went to Ocean City to get ice cream. It was nice, we saw a sand castle of Jesus and words that said "HAVE FAITH." There were gospel tracts there too in a water jug. I thought it was cool and encouraging to see people using their gifts to share the gospel. Gifts that I didn't think could be used directly to share the gospel I guess.

Caleb bought deep fried oreos, like 6 of them, with the intention of sharing it with people. It was thoughtful of him to buy oreos to share with the class (Christ's love again). I was encouraged to do the same, however not many wanted to accept our gifts of love haha. We both saved them for our ice cream. I got banana ice cream dipped in chocolate. The chocolate solidified on my ice cream, it was good.

Then we got back to the campsite and started our campfires again. We had apples, corn, and potatoes. I don't know who bought them, maybe Cheryl? But Cheryl, Angel, and I think Lina were preparing the potatoes and corn. How nice (Christ's love again), I decided to help them too. I sat with Joyce and Caleb after. The corn was really good. Eric then got the guitar and they were singing songs. Albert, Asaph, and Linda, and many others sat at another table and started talking about relationships. Mikey wanted them to bring the conversation to the campfire but they were too busy in their conversations, so the people at the campfire decided to talk a little about relationships. The boys wanted girls to drop hints back when boys were dropping hints that they liked the girls. The girls were saying that guys should just initiate regardless of what hints the girls drop back. Then the guys were saying they didn't want to because they didn't want it to get awkward. Caleb had nice insight and said that it was basically girls and guys just wanting more from the other party. He also clarified the boys position by saying that girls would naturally respond to boys hints if the girl liked or disliked the boy.

After that, Caleb, Lina, Joyce, and I started singing songs again from Christina's songbook. Albert joined in after. There was a time when we were just singing songs and not singing seriously. Caleb said, "If were not gonna sing it seriously, we might as well not sing it." He wasn't saying it to rebuke us I think, but he was just saying it casually as if to say, "let's move onto another song", but I took it like a conviction. I think we should sing seriously in worship when we singing praises to God.

Everyone went to sleep and it was just Lina and I singing songs. I felt kinda bad because we were singing and everyone was trying to sleep. Lina and I went to brush our teeth. When we came back, we saw that our campsite was surrounded by horses. I could barely see without my glasses so I could only see blurry figures of horses. Caleb was awake though and was using a pan to scare the horses away. Lina was freaking out haha and we decided to take a different route. I was really scared too because we were literally surrounded. The check in place said that we should be bus lengths away from horses, and I wasn't for some of the horses. Caleb was then going to sleep. He also disappeared, leaving me alone to defend the site. There were horses attacking the girls tent, so I had to scare them off using Eric's board. But then Caleb came and we scared them off together.

A large number of people were sleeping in their cars. Our tent was filled with bugs, so Calvin, Asaph, and Albert didn't sleep in our tent. Caleb and I were trying to sleep in the cars too, but Caleb thought it was too uncomfortable. I was supposed to sleep in Calvins car, but it didn't seem like a good idea either. So we decided to sleep in the tent, us two.

We got into the tent and talked a little about the wind. We were talking about how we were complaining about it earlier, but it was actually a good thing because without it, there were a lot of bugs biting us, and also ait became really hot and humid. Caleb said that it was God's way of humbling us. We also talked about worship and what it does. We have friends who say that it allows God to work in the atmosphere of where worship occurs. I asked for Caleb's opinion, and he asked for Scriptural texts, but I couldn't provide any.

The next day we took showers. Angel was frying potatoes and we just sat around and packed up. We then left and we ate at sonic. I caught up with Asaph there and saw how he was doing with his career and with church.

Then I rode with Antwoine and Calvin home. Antwoine was talking about the trip how it didn't go exactly the way he intended it. I noticed how Calvin was really compassionate and pointed out where Antwoine was wrong lovingly. It was an encouragement and I realized that I can be legalistic and dogmatic, instead of encouraging and loving when people expressed frustrations with me.

I got home and that's it...haha

It was a nice trip, I learned a lot. I thank God for you KCM Class of 2012!

At this time of year, there are a lot of graduations, graduation parties, and senior banquets. That means a lot of pictures. Group pictures, and pictures of people taking pictures with other people.

I don't think I'm a good person to take pictures with. For example, I can't smile on command. There are other reasons...

So...

Who would go through the trouble of taking a solo pic with me? I don't smile. I don't add anything especially nice to people that I take pictures with. I'm lame.

But...

Still my brothers and sisters in Christ want to take pictures with me. Why why why?

I think it's because of Christ's love in them.

This is Christ's love...

"but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us."
-Romans 5:8

So...

While I was a sinner and enemy of God, while I was exalting myself above God, while I was finding satisfaction in things other than God, while I was giving praise to things other than God, while I was making God sad and angry, while I was doing things that deserved and earned God's wrath...

God sent His only begotten Son, Jesus Christ, the perfect and beautiful Son of God, to die for me and bear God's wrath in my place, so that I can have a personal relationship with God.

Why why why why why?

God is good. He is love.

Thank you brothers and sisters for giving me greater understandings of this truth by your loving actions. I hope I can love you all as well with Christ's love.