But if that's what it takes to praise You Jesus...

I'd say for the past couple days I haven't been able to sleep properly.
It's not because I am used to sleeping late. But just because I don't feel like it...
Like I know I need to sleep early, I was planning to today, but I guess...I don't know, even though I'm really sleepy, I just don't feel like sleeping.

I guess I just have a lot of stuff on my mind lately...

Along with sleeping problems, I've been having a hard time concentrating. It's been hard talking to other people, especially when talking about theological stuff. I just feel like I can't comprehend what they are trying to say. Like this John Piper book, When I Don't Desire God: How to Fight For Joy. I got back to reading it the other day and decided to start over so I could understand the book better. But I just ended up getting more confused. I couldn't even comprehend the words, that I have already comprehended.

Especially in Bible studies, when Matt Chung is leading, I can't comprehend what he's saying sometimes. Fearful fear? what? And also during prayer requests, sometimes I can't catch too easily what they're saying. I really have to try hard to understand....

Or just talking to Brendon and Joe. Sometimes I would ask them something and they would say something that appears to be on topic, however doesn't have much to do with what I asked. I mean it's not their fault. I think it's mine, because I am so out of it. I just get confused even more. And sometimes I would ask my pastor some questions and I would just get confused even more. I don't know how what he said really applies to my question. I guess because they aren't blunt with their answers. They make me try to answer my own question by presenting Biblical truth. And all I have to do is apply these truths and definitions.

It's really late right now, but I don't really care. I am just staring at my screen aimlessly......

What's going on...